How Many Kids – Baby Mamas/Daddy’s Is Too Much?
Not everybody can be the Brady bunch. In their scenario the respective other spouses were deceased. But that is not the case for us all and there are men and women out there who have multiple children with more than one person, more than one spouse more than one hookup. So, my question to you is, how many is too many? And what situations are you not willing to work with if your potential mate has kids?
In my life, I am 1:1, one kid, one dad and I will be 36 very soon. But on this fantastic dating journey that I am on, I have to say, I have found some crazy ratio’s. 3:3, 4:3, and yes, 5:4. I have had to ask my self, how many extra kids and women am I willing to deal with. With 3:3, nope, I’m not gonna do it. If you have three kids with 3 mothers, you are sloppy. 4:3, married twice young and some chick on the side with the youngest kid being younger than mine and you are older than me…yeah not gonna work. And for the 5:4 dude, that stopped the conversation cold and I think I hung up the phone immediately. I didn’t even want to hear the story. To make it simple, these are the types of situations that I have found:
The ones with the babies (kids under 3): Usually fresh off of a break-up. Still spending some severe parenting time with the CoParent. Possibly still bitter and angry working out custody, support issues. You may end up having to play mommy to his kid when the kid is around should you ever be there. They usually want you to meet their kid early. The CoParent is usually not excited at all about you spending time with their young impressionable child. Expect issues.
The ones with older kids: (over 12 years old): These are usually the best. The kids can fend for themselves. Hopefully the breakup was long enough ago that they have worked out all of their CoParenting issues. If not, the kid is old enough to navigate between both parents to they do not have too many issues with each other. The kid will either be your friend, or absolutely hate you.
The ones with multiple CoParents(more than two mothers): Unless this dude has been married twice or in two serious relationships, I would be highly cautious when dealing with this person. If they are over 40, well then that could be a bit more acceptable, but if you want more kids, you have to factor that in.
Your’s, Mine and Ours (you have more than one kid, they have more than one kid and more than one CoParent): This situation right here, why in the world would you want to enter into it. But I know some of you do so. Lets hope they are all old, and everyone is happy otherwise RUN.
On top of that, there are so many other factors and situations, these I named above just happen to be the most common.
In my past relationship, I was step mom to 3 kids from 1 mother. That was a herculean task, but I did it. Frankly, I am not sure if I want to do it again. My ideal would be someone who is my age or not too much older or not too much younger with no kids, that would be the jackpot , or maybe someone with a 15-17 year old. But I am realizing that I may just be me searching for somewhat of a unicorn.
This brings me to my man Shorty Lo, who has 11 kids and 10 baby mama’s or mothers of his kids to be politically correct, and who, has a new girlfriend. Enjoy the clip and its wonderfulness! Now, understand this brilliant new chick is 19 and probably has a low emotional IQ, but for the rest of us dating women with kids out there, just how many hens and chicks are you willing to deal with? Discuss my lovelies!